the mind *%$)
or maybe that’s too closed ended
maybe i should seek an actual conversation
since a couple days ago i did say of it “i kinda wanna call and ask why”
the little girl i babysit would sternly turn, perhaps with expectation, but also with patience, and ask, “why did you do that???”
and then she would wait
maybe that should be my approach
but we’re supposed to be grown here
do i have to ask why?
should i know the answer? or am i sick with trying to read minds?
i’m no psychic
i don’t even know if i chose the right towels at the store today
all these things seem to make it more and more difficult for me to trust myself
and i’m ME!
i should know what i like and what i don’t and what works and what may not
i should be able to feel things out by now
i remember the advice of an old friend in college: just have fun! keep him around until it’s not fun anymore
this hasn’t been fun for days
…so do i ask, or is it important enuf to ask?
do i just let go and leave it to my wonderment?
and move on…?
and does it count as moving on if i don’t forget it?
how do i go about forgetting…?
